The gratitude journal has become almost cliché in the self-help space for a reason: IT WORKS.
I’m serious when I say that keeping a daily gratitude journal will literally change your life. And it’s essentially free, as long as you can find a pen and paper (or your iPhone Notes app). This practice takes less than 5 minutes out of your day. It essentially requires next to no effort, AND you’ll see results.
There’s not much else you can do that can make that kind of promise, except maybe brushing/flossing your teeth. Did you know your oral health really is that important and can affect the health of your heart? I digress. (but also, the body is so fascinating!)
First off—Happy November, everybody! It always feels like a noticeable change from summer to the short, dark days of winter, at least here in San Diego. Even though we know it’s coming, it always seems to happen so quickly. The weather doesn’t exactly get *cold*, per se, but there’s a shift in the natural energy, the light becomes softer, and everything starts to slow down. Daylight savings time always forces me to really ground myself to avoid getting drained by that activation in Kapha energy (from Ayurveda; a slower, heavier energy). I’ve always been sensitive to Seasonal Affective Disorder (literally also known as SAD) and the reduction in sun energy.
I’m becoming more comfortable with the acceptance that I’m an empath and that everything affects me a little too dramatically, but also that maybe gives me a little spicy flair? Any fellow empaths in the house? Give me a shout below in the Comments.
My gratitude journal practice has helped me through some really hard times.
I had quite the October. And by that I mean I had a really sad, challenging month. I had to return to Oahu to pack up and move all of my belongings as I proceed with my divorce. I know I’m taking all the right steps forward. But that doesn’t mean the path is easy—sometimes life is just hard.
I’d like to thank everyone who took the time to reach out to me after my latest Instagram post where I opened up about the depression I’ve been facing. I’ve turned a corner and am doing much better; even though I have many challenges ahead, I feel rooted back in optimism and strength.
November is all about giving thanks, so I figured this would be the perfect time to talk about how helpful keeping a gratitude journal has been to get my mental state realigned back to its highest, most productive level. It’s brought me hope on some very bleak days.
Essentially, the goal of a gratitude journal is for us to keep our sights on the light.
You may have heard this before:
Where attention goes, energy flows.
I believe I first heard this phrase from Tony Robbins—it’s popular in the wellness space because it’s so profound and so simple. What we pay attention to expands.
This can actually be explained scientifically by a part of the brain stem called the reticular activating system. This system determines what’s relevant to you and tunes out other information. Your brain can’t process every single thing that’s happening at any given time, so to help you focus it scans the scene and highlights what it decides is most important to you, kind of like a computer code, and filters out the rest.
Have you ever noticed that if you’re considering buying a Prius, you’ll suddenly see all those cute Toyota hybrids around, whereas before you never notice what kinds of cars were driving around you?
The intention of writing in your gratitude journal every day (and why consistency is key!) is to reprogram your brain to tell it what to stay on the lookout for. In this case, finding things to be grateful for! Our brains are incredible in their ability to create new connections and grow.
You can actually make yourself happier with your gratitude journal practice.
This article from Harvard Medical School explains that repeatedly in psychology research “gratitude is strongly and consistently associated with greater happiness.”
Want to be happier? I think we can all agree that’s high on the list of life desires.
When we’re in an unhappy state, our brains get stuck in a thought loop that’s focused entirely on the negative. Gratitude forces us to stop that cycle and fire up new regions of the brain that can create new thoughts that are more positive and constructive to our lives.
Think of writing a gratitude journal as strength training for your brain: it will become stronger and more resilient to ward off thoughts that threaten to drag you down. And you’ll become happier as you realize just how much goodness in life you have to be thankful for!
How to start a gratitude journal:
It’s beyond easy. Follow these steps:
1. At the end of the day, write down 3 things you are grateful for.
2. Repeat this practice every. single. day.
and, here’s the real secret rule I have to share with you:
3. You must write down something different every day; you can’t choose something you’ve used before.
I cannot emphasize enough how important #3 is to the list.
I actually tried keeping a gratitude journal when I was a teenager after watching an episode of Oprah where she recommended it. And for a week, I wrote more or less the same 3 things down. I was depressed and struggled to think of anything to write.
Picture me as a very emo and angry teenager listening to Death Cab for Cutie.
Needless to say, I gave up and didn’t try a gratitude journal again until earlier this year.
So yeah, I realized the exercise is far more effective when you’re forced to have to search your memories for new good things at the end of each day.
I’ll be honest—some days I still struggle with what to write down. Sometimes I have to really sit and search my heart for something to include, because I’m so bogged down by my heartache that it clouds my mind.
So, if you feel at all angry or frustrated or discouraged when you sit down with your journal, just know that that’s okay. And it’s bound to happen, especially in the first month, especially if your brain’s used to subconsciously focusing on the negative.
But even on those hard days you must find something, anything, to write down. I promise you can. Some days I give thanks for things like french fries (what would life be without them?). They don’t have to be big—you just have to find three.
Write in your gratitude journal every day for at least a month.
This is the hardest part about the challenge: getting started and building the habit consistently. Once you’re used to journaling every day, the practice will flow and keep you focused with less and less effort. But in the beginning, you have to hold yourself accountable. Training your mind works the same way as building your muscles when you work out: you have to do it repeatedly over time to see any lasting results.
Keeping your heart and mind focused on gratitude will help you stay focused on the light. Sure, we could choose to focus on the darkness instead. And our minds may try. But it is a choice, so why not go with the one that doesn’t cause further suffering and instead makes you feel a little better?
After all, it feels good to celebrate the fact that corgis exist in this universe.
There is so much abundance to be grateful for.